Fear – What to do with it?

29 Nov 2013

Fear – What to do with it?

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Fear of the dark.  Fear of heights.  Fear of spiders. Fear of small places.  Fear of letting your parents, friends or family down.  Fear of the future.  Fear of crowds.  Fear of the unknown.  Fear of turning out like your parents.  Fear of success.  Fear of being judged. Fear of being alone.  Fear of rejection.  Fear of failure.  Fear!

We all have fears.  If we don’t face them the consequences can be significant.  How do we deal with fear?

Step one: analyze the fear.  Why are you afraid?  Where does the fear come from?  Before you are able to face your fear and conquer it you must understand where it comes from and why you are afraid.  This may require a lot of soul searching and admitting to things you want to deny or pretend don’t exist.  You must be willing to be brutally honest with yourself.  I fear this and this is why!  It may take help to learn this.  Don’t be afraid to seek help in order to discover what’s in your past and who you are today.  It will be worth it!

Next:  determine what is real and what is not real.  On a certain level, of course it is real!  You’re afraid of something and the fear is very real.  However, the big question is it reasonable or not?  Is what you fear based in a likelihood of it happening or is it an unrealistic fear.  It may very well be that you are afraid of something that will never come to be or poses no danger to you.  This basic process has the potential of greatly reducing the impact of what you fear.

If the fear is reasonable and has some likelihood of occurrence then you will need to confront and completely acknowledge the fear.  Don’t deny it or try to hide from it.  Don’t make excuse or blame others. Admit it is a fear.  Before you are able to honestly acknowledge the fear you won’t be able to overcome it.

Now it’s time to look at your fear.  What are all the possibilities, even the ridiculous?   What will happen if you fail or your worst fear comes true?  How bad will it be?  Once you’ve processed it and determined the worst possible outcome, decide if you are able to live with the result.  If you can live with that there is nothing to fear!

Prepare!  Being ready to face your fear gives you power over it.  Decide what you need to do to make you more confident when the time comes.  Study, practice, and learn all you can.  Preparation helps remove doubt and replaces the doubt with confidence.   The more prepared you feel the more control you will have over your fear.

Don’t ever give in or give up.  Push through the fear to the other side.  Make a commitment to not give in to the fear. Do what it is you fear and to proceed in spite of your fear.  Don’t give in or give up because of your fear.

You have the power to overcome your fears.  Each time you confront your fear it will lose some of its power over you.  Eventually you will over come it.  But you must never, ever give up and don’t ever let fear win!

You’re Not Alone!